Right now I am boiling over. Steam is coming out of my ears. I am pissed off.  Got the picture?  For 6 years I have run a Girl Scout Troop.  Six years.  We are ending this year because my daughter is done, I am done.  We have money  in the bank and as a last hurrah I have planned a fun afternoon for the girls at an amusement park. My own daughter doesn't even want to go - but I feel the money the troop earned should be spent on all the girls.   It was originally planned for Monday - but my co-leader was going to be on vacation so I changed it.  She just informed me that she can't come tomorrow either.  WTF? Are you kidding me.  I rearranged everything - yesterday would have been so much better for me - to accommodate someone else - and then get screwed.  I am so done. Another parent e-mailed me today - doesn't know if she can make it - will let me know tomorrow - uh no - its a group rate - can't let me know tomorrow.  Why are people so rude and irresponsible?  Again, the steam is coming out.

I have ranted before about don't volunteer if you can't follow through.  Cara and I have both complained about how it's always the same faces at all the meetings.  When you sign up to volunteer, its a commitment - sometimes a time consuming one. 

There are no excuses if you can't do something.  I have a young child - I get a babysitter.  My husband works late - again babysitter.  For years, I hired someone else to watch my kids so I could volunteer.  Crazy right?  I am done.  No more volunteering.  No more unnecessary babysitters.  No more.

Cara's  two three cents: Yikes! OK first if it was me...trip is off. (especially since Mae does not want to go) Go buy everyone a giftcard to Mayberry ice cream shop with money and mail them out. Two, I agree with the getting a sitter to go volunteer. Nuts. Unless it something you really want to be at I guess. I don't know if it's just that we are burnt now three kids later with it all. When I see someone in a "position" doing it half assed I think I could do that so much better but I have to bite my tongue. But it's hard to be quiet sometimes. I have decided for me, for now..unless it directly affects my kids then I am out. Especially this year with a kid graduating. I will take it year by year now instead of just jumping with both feet, sleeves rolled up. Three, have a glass of wine for breakfast.

Okay enough with the corruption, the fighting, the accusing, the trash-talking, the b.s. of politics. I have had it! I am tired of reading about the health care plan - put-up or shut-up. Scale back your 2700 page proposal. In fact, use it as fire starter and ask the PEOPLE what they want. Right now the polls are showing the PEOPLE aren't so interested in changing the health care system. Everyone agrees, all tax-paying, law-abiding, citizens are entitled to some form of affordable health care. But we have bigger problems. Let's talk about the Governor of NY trying to cover-up a domestic abuse case for one of his aids. Are you kidding me? Did you learn nothing from Client 9? Or what about the senator caught cheating on his wife or taxes or not picking up his pups poop? If you choose to go into politics - and yes it is a choice - don't expect to get away with anything. We the PEOPLE are watching, waiting, listening and I think we are all getting tired of hearing about all these politicians getting caught with their pants down or their hand in the cookie jar or whatever the latest scandal is. Does becoming a politician automatically give one a sense of entitlement - the I can do it because I am a big muckety-muck syndrome? I just don't get it. I have no desire to be President - or Secretary of State or even a local board member. I applaud those who step up and become public servants - but lately I have been thinking for what purpose? What drives an individual to seek public office knowing that most of the good will go unnoticed and all of the bad will end up splashed across the countries papers? I think many of these politicians these days are frustrated Rock Stars - they can't sing so they need another way to become famous - light bulb moment - become a politician.

Cara's two cents: And they say I'M cranky....

The world is full of people who are dishonest. The world is full of people who are murderous. The world is full of people who want to hurt you or you children. I try to believe that good outweighs evil. I talk to my children about the evils lurking out there - try to keep them safe. I tend to err on the side of caution - not believe every email I get or every rumour I hear. I don't click on e-mail from people or companies I don't know.

This morning on the news there was a headline story about the lowlifes already running their scams in the name of the victims of Haiti. There are apparently e-mails and links out there begging for money - none of it going to Haiti but into some con-artists pocket. You always want to believe that you are smarter than that. That you won't be the one who clicks on a link that gives you a virus or give money to someone who is bogus. But even the smartest out there can be fooled. Recently my mom got an e-mail from her bank. She opened it. She followed the directions. She realized too late it was a fake. She is a smart, educated woman. She teaches computer classes, she knows about the fakes and yet she was fooled. Luckily she got to the bank before the scammers. It is that easy. Sometimes you let your defenses down and just click on the wrong thing. The internet is a wonderful thing - but like everything else, it can be used for the wrong reasons as well as the right.

I was so mad this morning when I heard the warning on the news about the Haiti scams. It is such a horrendous tragedy that has befallen that country. To take advantage of that is appalling - to take advantage of people who want to help is even worse. I always tell my kids to make good choices - I wish every mother would - then we wouldn't have these scammers and lowlifes out there.

Not everything. There’s a difference.

I do it all or nothing. I used to try to do EVERYTHING all or nothing…that’s impossible, I have found that out the hard way. But what I do choose to do…be it Christmas decorating, throwing a party, helping out a friend it’s all or nothing. If I can’t do it right to best of my ability then I am not doing it. If I say I am gonna do it, whatever it may be come hell or high water I will do it.

This is why our town Christmas Tree lighting on Friday night really bugged me. Usually the Swing singing group from our HS sings beautiful accapella Christmas carols on the steps of Town Hall, the town officials say a few words, the smaller children gather around the “magic button” and turn the lights on the giant pine tree that stands in the middle of town, and there’s free hot chocolate for all! Sounds like a Norman Rockwell painting doesn’t it? Yeah well not this year folks. They cut down that big tree over the summer. And they asked the younger choir from the elementary school to sing, (cute, but let’s say less than melodic) they lit some very lame 7 ft tree that had some crappy lights “thrown” on it and the hot chocolate tasted like brown water. Am I the Grinch? No. I am just an all or nothing type of gal.

If cutting back has lessened what the Town can do for the tree lighting or the big old pine was dead and needed to be cut down I get it. I can even take the blah hot chocolate that was apparently made by some orangutan…you get what you pay for and like I said it was free.

But for crying out loud, keep the choir that sings so beautifully (for free) that the Townsfolk enjoy singing along with. The little singers were adorable but when it’s not your kid or some cute little kid you know singing, it’s really not that enjoyable. There were older people who came to enjoy the town tradition that were kinda talking amongst themselves while the kids were singing or lip syncing… am I am not even sure which.

Decorate the small pathetic tree well. Trim the tree with beautiful evenly placed lights and ornaments. Have all the children that pushed the “magic button” take a picture by the tree to put in the town paper, not the politicians who threw the lights on the lame tree.

I left annoyed. I was annoyed that I inhaled my dinner to get Mike over there not to miss a thing. I was annoyed to high heaven about that tree. I have to drive by it every day now I feel like sneaking over there in the dark of night and adding lights to it. I was annoyed and the blatant lack of enthusiasm or attention to detail. The only thing that didn’t annoy me was that Mike thought the hot chocolate was fine, he got to push the button and run around in the dark with his buddies. He left happy. That’s all that really matters I know…but I also know that the details matter. At least they matter to me.

(from Monday...)
Some days I wonder where the time goes. The two teenagers in the house basically don’t need me unless it’s for a lift somewhere. The little guy's in camp from 9-2…I know that’s practically all day. So why is it almost camp pickup time but I feel like I didn’t get anything done? Let’s back track shall we?

7:00 am alarm goes off. I hit snooze. I'm bewildered for a minute as to what day it is…feels like Sunday…can sleep awhile longer? Ugh, no it’s Monday. Mike needs to be up at 8:00 for camp…I need TWM* for at least an hour (*time without mike) so I get up. Thankfully I took a shower last night so I don’t need to do that, yeah.

7:15ish- 8:19 am – Make coffee, feed four-legged kids, get newspaper from driveway, update blog and website, check email, drink ½ cup of coffee, Hubby comes flying downstairs…late for morning meeting. Why didn’t I wake him up??? (uh…ok)

8:20- 9:00 am – Get Mike ready…look for sneakers…pack lunch…make him breakfast...sign him on to Webkinz…feed fish…make his bed and tidy up his room covered with wrestling figures….drink some more of now cold coffee…get myself dressed…shove kid out the door...zoom to camp

9:02 am-9:15 am …shove kid into camp…check in with counselors…kiss kid…think "ok I am off to do my stuff for the day"...wave hi to friends…no time to chat gotta go….see friend who needs box for moving wait until she shoves her kid at camp counselors cause I have the box in my car…start talking to other friend meanwhile…box friend joins conversation…

9:15-9:35 am - give friend box…late friends pulls up…must tease her for being late…find that she is having a crappy morning…may cause bodily harm to oldest child when she sees him later…talk friend off the ledge by commiserating about it being in the air today that our kids may get it today too…talk for a while about this and that* (t&t meaning…husband, fresh kids, work, old people, beach, little girls who think they are too busy today to go their camp etc. etc. etc.)

9:40-11:00 – Check the blog…facebook…email again…drink more coffee…redo some of my shopping list because I already bought some of the stuff on it. I remember there are towels in the washing machine & put them in dryer…write self a note to put on dryer when I get back don’t like to leave dryer on when I am not home…make bed…feed cats again…they eat OFTEN... I really wanted to be home for like 20 minutes but end up being home for longer…still not exactly sure why… I think it’s the "One More Thing Before I Go Syndrome" whereas I keep trying to get one more thing done before I walk out the door…end up doing five things and then realize I gotta go…

11:00-1:00 – Food shop at two different grocery stores so that’s double duty of filling up carts with groceries, putting them on belts, packing them into bags, putting them back into wagon, taking them out of wagon and loading them in car, oh and don’t forget double the orangutan encounters! But, I was still being nice so that was not so bad. So I get home at 1:15ish and have to once again unload the bags and put the stuff away. Then it’s 1:45 and I have to go to camp pick up for 2:00.

So yes, I am a SAHM. I don’t have a 9-5 job…I have a 24/7 job. Hours are hell. Pay sucks. Employers can be a pain. But I still love it most days. Just don’t ask me what I do all day…as if I sit and eat bon bons. I really don’t think I sat other than between 8:20-9:00 a.m.
Time flies when you are having fun.