Friday, October 21, 2011

PostHeaderIcon Cara: Guest Blogger

I so enjoy the Guest Blogger. I have people tell me all the time "I should put that on your blog" and I am always like Yes!! Please do!!! But then they chicken out. Not sure why. I will always do my best to keep your identity somewhat secret. I love to have a different "voice" on here now and again. So if you ever need to vent or have something you think is worth sharing please don't hesitate to let us know. We don't edit(although I will have to fix a typo if I see it otherwise I will get  rash). And we don't even have to agree (much)...always keeping it real.

So today I am happy to have Rosie the Riveter back as a Guest Blogger.

Square Pegs.

No, not the '80s TV show that launched SJP (although, that was good too) but kids. You know the ones I mean, the square pegs in a world made up of round holes. I have one like that. He is special. All three of my boys are special to me, and all so different, but there is one.

You see he has always been special. Every circumstance of his life has had a certain wow factor. He is a twin. Multiples by way of modern science is not that uncommon in this day and age but this is the child who was no where to be found at that first sonogram but miraculously was there a week later. A tiny little heart beat, just as strong as his brother's. Where did he come from? Where was he hiding the week before? “I can't believe we missed that” said the doctor, but there he was. I knew then he was meant to be mine and was catching the last bus. This was it, the last chance. After almost 7 years of trying to complete our family this was the last try.

That was only the beginning of his magic tricks. You see, the boys decided that 27 weeks was long enough of the ride on that bus and were getting off at the next stop. So early and so tiny what would be the next trick. Well my little square peg began having complications. Serious ones. Complications that required surgical intervention, IV feeding and tons of medication. They told us to prepare ourselves, he may not make it. The doctor stood at his incubator for 24 hours straight. Watching. Waiting. Then a week passed and he improved. Then 2 more weeks, then a set back, a stroke. Would he be normal? They couldn't say, just wait and see. Three more surgeries and months later, he finally came home. My little square peg, just not quite like his brother. He had beat the odds and was healthy but now what.

Well the square peg forced his way through his infancy. Fighting withdrawal symptoms from medications and fighting to grow and precisely measured feedings, physical therapy and specialists. He wowed them all. Made every milestone, grew and thrived but always in his own way. The golden blond in the a family of brunettes, carried sunshine with him wherever he went as well as a dose of mischief. The duct-taped diapers, the Allen keys sticking out of outlets, the Houdini impression escaping the crib tent. Just not your average baby.

Well the not average baby is now your not average kindergartener. Kindergarten is a child's first real exposure to the world of round holes. He is doing well and learning. He gets along with the other kids for the most part but just doesn't seem to fit the mold as far as the teacher and bus driver are concerned. Now for the dilemma, I love my square peg just the way he is. He is a fighter, a survivor and an original character. I want him to enjoy school and learn what he should but I do not want him to stop being himself in order to make things easier for the teacher. He should behave and not be disruptive.

I am at an impasse on this one. I do not want him to stop being himself, the world is a better place with him in it but how do I get him to the place where his corners are a little smoother and maybe the holes are a little squarer? Any ideas?

Cara's two cents: Well first I must say I do love this square peg (and his two rounder peg brothers as well of course"). He is very funny. When else can you reminisce about duct taped diapers?? He has complimented me about my nail polish, jewelry and red hair since before he could talk. Who can resist a man that showers you with compliments? I love to have him come over and swim in my pool and go see him play football even if he walks off in the middle of the play because, well he was just done playing for the day. He will give you a run for your money and melt your heart at the same time. I have known this square peg since before he was born and even though he is in a roundish hole world, something tells me he will figure it all out. He has defied the odds before and I don't think anyone has begun to see what he will accomplish.


LW said...

Love this...and him! Sitting here with tears now! Thank you for sharing! :) xoxo

Anonymous said...

Tears here too...Even though I was not in his life when it was most challenging, I love, love that kid!...(Love the brunettes as well!)
Where would I be without the Awesome feeling that he gives me because he makes me feel sooo special - especially when he runs over to me, gives me one of his great hugs, and then....wants to go for a ride in my car!! You tell that boy that the whole world loves him JUST THE WAY HE IS! Besides, what's to say the world can't adjust and be a little "square" for him :0)............
ps: Tell him ... "I'll always have gum!"

Anonymous said...

I don't know your kid- but know what it's like to have a kid that doesn't fit 'the mold' it's so hard, as a parent we want our children to be themselves, and as a teacher, well, it makes our jobs much harder as we now have 25 kids (more or less in some schools) and are expected for everyone to have the same advice, and again, I have a square peg, and some round ones too, is to talk to the teacher and see where he/she can give some room for creativity, does he/she know what he's been through? Sometimes background helps, and also realize that come the end of the day the expectations of your square peg is the same as the round ones...being a parent sometimes stinks, until that sunshine comes along and gives you a well deserved hug!! My best to you and your square and round pegs, too

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