Showing posts with label mothering. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mothering. Show all posts
Monday, October 25, 2010
Cara: Striving for perfection?
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Cara
Someone in a recent "heated" discussion said to me "Oh I forgot you are the perfect mother". I dam near lost my mind. Granted there were other things going on before and during this "discussion" there were contributors to why I wanted to throttle this person. But later on after the dust settled I was thinking about why that was the one thing this person said to really set me off.
Do I think I am the "perfect mother"? Do other people perceive me as someone who thinks she is the "perfect mother"?
Do I think I am perfect? Not even close. Do I sometimes set myself up striving for perfection and miss the mark? Yeah, most days. I think we would all love to be perfect at least once in awhile. And I would go out on a limb and say some days I could come pretty close...mothering wise that is. (in other ways...maybe not so much)
As moms we have some days we are awesome. (someone else also once told me "you are awesome at life"...I prefer to remind myself of that comment rather than "perfect") We are right on it. Make the right decision. Take the kid to the doctor 'cause we just know they are getting sick to find they have a raging ear infection brewing. Make them a birthday cake they still talk about 12 years later.
I could make an equally long list of the days when we are maybe not so perfect. One that would include yelling like a banshee when they have put us over the edge for the 10th time in a day. Or not having the patience of a saint that it takes to help a kid get four pages of spelling done at 5:00 in the afternoon. Or looking for a moment, at a teenager with thoughts of ways to inflict pain on them, while thinking this cannot be the sweet child who once thought I was all that and a bag of chips.
So do I strive for perfection? Maybe in 100 little ways. Will there ever be total perfection? Never. I hope that is not the face I present to the world. I know I would not want to be around someone who thinks they are perfect. Imperfect people who brag all the time are enough for me to want to pummel...never mind the perfect person.
So June Cleaver I will never be. Maybe somewhere between her and Rosanne Connor is a comfy place to sit. I'll take it.
Do I think I am the "perfect mother"? Do other people perceive me as someone who thinks she is the "perfect mother"?
Do I think I am perfect? Not even close. Do I sometimes set myself up striving for perfection and miss the mark? Yeah, most days. I think we would all love to be perfect at least once in awhile. And I would go out on a limb and say some days I could come pretty close...mothering wise that is. (in other ways...maybe not so much)
As moms we have some days we are awesome. (someone else also once told me "you are awesome at life"...I prefer to remind myself of that comment rather than "perfect") We are right on it. Make the right decision. Take the kid to the doctor 'cause we just know they are getting sick to find they have a raging ear infection brewing. Make them a birthday cake they still talk about 12 years later.
I could make an equally long list of the days when we are maybe not so perfect. One that would include yelling like a banshee when they have put us over the edge for the 10th time in a day. Or not having the patience of a saint that it takes to help a kid get four pages of spelling done at 5:00 in the afternoon. Or looking for a moment, at a teenager with thoughts of ways to inflict pain on them, while thinking this cannot be the sweet child who once thought I was all that and a bag of chips.
So do I strive for perfection? Maybe in 100 little ways. Will there ever be total perfection? Never. I hope that is not the face I present to the world. I know I would not want to be around someone who thinks they are perfect. Imperfect people who brag all the time are enough for me to want to pummel...never mind the perfect person.
So June Cleaver I will never be. Maybe somewhere between her and Rosanne Connor is a comfy place to sit. I'll take it.
Jenn's two cents: I think most Mom's strive to be the best they can be - some days we hit the mark other days we are way off...but when people see a Mom who has more good days than bad they label her, maybe fighting back their own insecurities regarding parenting? Cara is a GREAT mom - her kids behavior and her relationship with them proves it - I bet if you asked MP about his mom he would say she is perfect even when she is screaming like a banshee!
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