Thursday, June 4, 2009

PostHeaderIcon Jenn: Divorce

Last night I got a call from my estranged sister-in-law. We do not talk to my husbands brother - long story. But my sister-in-law, who I have not seen or talked to in a over a year called to tell me she finally got up the nerve to leave her husband and they were getting a divorce - a week before her daughters HS graduation. I can't blame her, I don't know how she stayed as long as she did - but what to say in a situation like this? I don't know any divorced people - which is kind of surprising in this day and age. All of my friends are married - some probably more happily than others. There are two girls involved - one turning 12 next week, and one turning 18 in November - they are the ones I worry about. I would like to reach out to these girls - to offer them my open door, a shoulder to cry on, support on some level, but since I don't talk to their dad, I really am limited in contacting them. I hope they know I am on their side, not their parents. I think we all have our breaking point in life - I am sad my sister-in-law reached hers, but at the same time I am glad she is getting herself out of an unhealthy situation. I hope these girls will rely on each other - and come through this sad time OK. I hope they realize that they are not a reflection of their parents or at fault for any of this. I hope they know they are not alone.

Cara's two cents: Divorce is sad. Crazy thing is I just had a phone conversation with cousins last night on the same topic, Must be something in the air. I hope those kids are ok.


Elizabeth said...

Divorce is the second most stressful life event a person can experience. life. Having lived through a divorce I can attest to that. I'd don't know this particular situations details and every divorce is different. I work as a trained volunteer with children of divorce and one thing I have learned is children like to know they are not alone in the situation. They like to know they have peers who are in a similar situation and have lived through it. There are free support groups out there for the 12 year old. The High Schooler may be having the time of her life and getting ready for college that she may not grieve or deal with it until a much later date. Divorce is very common, now I think alot of couples stay together more for financial reasons. If you find the girls need support and you need some leads let me know. - Elizabeth

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