Wednesday, September 28, 2011

PostHeaderIcon Cara: Whiny Wednesday

Been awhile since I vented some peeves or whined. (no, really!) so well, it is Wednesday.....

Door to door salespeople. Now I know you have to make a living and I can respect that. But for whatever reason I am getting like 4 people a week knocking at my door. I will look out most times and see it's one of you and not answer the door.

But when I do that, can you not be sitting outside my house in your creepy car, in the dark waiting for me to come home?And when I do, and I am sitting in my car talking with my son in my driveway can you not approach my car (in the dark mind you)? Lucky for your ass my husband was also in the driveway. He bought your Buffalo Wild Wing coupons. (why is beyond me) I would have told you to get lost. (after I backed over you in my driveway IN THE DARK) And maybe after Mr Nice Guy said yes could you not try and shake him down to buy double (IN THE DARK, IN MY DRIVEWAY)? Thank you.

Salesperson number 2. When I mistakenly open the dam door thinking you were someone else...saying "want to come out and and play in the rain?" while you twirl your umbrella is really not a good way to get a foot in the door (so to speak). Actually at my door it's a good way to get a foot in your ass. In a world of robberies on the rise and home invasions being sassy and "cute" when people open the door is a good way to get shot.

Then after you try to fast talk me into buying your cleaning product that I MUST have (dude, I am the Queen of Cleaning Products are you new? Apparently. I don't need what's in your spray bottle) I let you talk for a minute even though I am thoroughly annoyed that a) you think you are funny saying that you are Mexican so of course you are selling cleaning products and offer to landscape my yard (that is just a stupid thing for you to say) and b) I don't really care what you are selling. But then when I politely, with a smile, decline to purchase, then you start talking real fast while telling me that I AM going to purchase your product. (You are NOW pissing me off...but you are still new). I say again "no thank you", and start to close the door.

With that you say "well, your house has all mold on it good luck with cleaning that" and walk away. Really? Are you kidding me? I supress the urge to chase you down the walk and kick you in the face and say "good luck selling anything by being rude" and shut the door.

Do me a solid and let your other sales people friends at your next meeting, know not to come knock on the door attached to the front of my house. I will never open it again for any of you. And I won't hide so you think no one's home. I am done. Stick to telemarketing then you won't need an umbrella.

And yes, after he left, of course I went out to check the front of my house. Mold my elbow. Annnoying and a liar. Grrr.

OK. I am good. For now.

Jenn's two cents:  Cleaning product man showed up at my door too - he started with "your house is very big" to which I am thinking he is going to rob me and then he started promoting his cleaning business so I just said no thank you and closed and locked the door.  I think I will just refuse to open the door too! 

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